Psychologist for adolescents and parents · Bucharest and online
The adolescent
When the child begins to separate, and the family has to learn to let them go without losing them.
Adolescence is a second birth: the body changes, friendships become more important than family, and the question “who am I?” takes on a new urgency. Conflicts, closed doors and silences are, more often than not, signs of this separation, not of a failure.
For parents, it is often the moment when they no longer recognise the child they raised and no longer know where protection ends and control begins.
Areas of work
Withdrawal and silence
The adolescent who no longer talks, spends hours in their room or on their phone, answers in monosyllables. Sometimes it is a natural withdrawal; at other times it hides a suffering they cannot put into words. Adolescents need a space that is theirs alone; withdrawal may be exactly that.
Anxiety and pressure
School, exams, constant comparison on social media, the fear of not measuring up. In adolescents, anxiety often shows itself through the body: headaches or stomach aches, insomnia, refusing to go to school.
The body and self-image
A body that changes faster than it can be integrated, the gaze of others, comparison. The relationship with food and with one's own body can become the place where a more hidden suffering is expressed; when needed, I work together with the doctor.
Shyness
The adolescent who blushes when asked a question, who does not dare to speak in front of the class or to approach someone they like. In adolescence the body changes, and the gaze of others takes on a new power: adolescents feel watched all the time, even when they are not. Shyness is not a defect, and it usually eases with time. It is worth listening to, however, when it keeps them away from friends, from love or from the things they enjoy. Being pushed to “come out of their shell” does not help them; being understood does.
Conflicts with parents
Rules, curfews, school, the phone. Beneath the everyday disputes there is, more often than not, the same question: how free the adolescent can be and how reassured the parents can be. Adolescents need adults who can withstand conflict without rejecting them and without giving in; Winnicott insisted on this capacity of parents to “survive” their children's adolescence.
Falling in love and first sexual experiences
First love is also the first time desire is truly directed towards someone outside the family. It is intense, total, idealised, and a breakup can feel like the end of the world. First sexual experiences bring curiosity, but also pressure, shame or the fear of not being “normal”. Adolescents need to be able to talk about all of this safely, without being judged.
Friendships, disappointments, the group
In adolescence, friends often become more important than family. The group offers a mirror and a sense of belonging, a place where adolescents try out who they are before they know. That is why a lost friendship or a betrayal can weigh as much as a whole world, and the fear of not being accepted can push them towards choices that are not their own and that sometimes become risky.
Exclusion and bullying
Being left out, mocked or harassed, at school or online, leaves deep marks, because it touches the very question “am I worth anything to others?”. Many adolescents stay silent, out of shame or to protect their parents. At the same time, the adolescent who hurts others also needs help. Behind aggression there is often emptiness, loneliness and shame.
The neurodivergent adolescent
ADHD, autism, dyslexia and other forms of neurodivergence take on a new weight in adolescence. Peer pressure and the need to belong lead many to try to seem “like the others”, with an effort that exhausts them. Others, after years of hearing that they “don't try hard enough”, come to see themselves as the family's “problem”. Counselling helps adolescents understand the way they function and stop feeling like a “defect”. When needed, I work with the doctor and the school. Neurodivergence →
The gifted adolescent
A mind that runs ahead of the rest of development, and a sensitivity to match. Many gifted adolescents experience everything more intensely. The psychiatrist and psychologist Kazimierz Dąbrowski called this intensity overexcitability and described five forms of it: intellectual, emotional, imaginative, sensory and psychomotor. This intensity is not a problem to be corrected, but part of their gift. It also brings crises, however, which are not merely signs that something is wrong; they can also be the beginning of an inner reorganisation through which adolescents build their own values. Counselling accompanies them through this process, so that intensity becomes a resource, not a burden. Giftedness →
Performance: study, vocation, competition
School olympiads (subject competitions), entrance exams, rankings. For some adolescents, performance becomes the only place where they feel valuable. The pressure comes not only from outside, but also from an inner ideal that always demands more, or from the fear of making mistakes. That is why they can freeze precisely at the decisive moment. I played competitive chess as a child and adolescent, and I know how painful a silver medal can feel. I know how close the intense pleasure of the game lies to the fear of losing, of disappointing. Counselling helps the pleasure of playing become stronger than the fear, so that competing with yourself remains a source of growth, not of suffering. Every game, won or lost, can teach you something priceless. The high-achieving child →
The adolescent living with a chronic illness
When an adolescent has an illness that requires constant monitoring, their need for autonomy and for a stronger sense of self-worth can come into direct conflict with the limits imposed by the illness and with the treatment. Type 1 diabetes →
If you recognise yourself here, write to me →
Who it is for
- Adolescents — a space of their own, separate from their parents, where they can talk without everything getting back home
- Parents — individually or together, to think through their own worries and their place in the relationship with the adolescent
What my experience is made of
I am a clinical psychologist licensed in Romania and a psychoanalytic psychotherapist in training.
How it works
- Write to me using the form below or by email. A few lines are enough; there is no need to explain everything.
- I reply within 1–2 working days and we arrange the time of the first meeting together.
- The first meeting, 45 minutes long, at the practice or online, is devoted to understanding the situation. Only then do we decide together whether and how to continue.
The framework
Sessions last 45 minutes and take place at my practice or online. I usually begin with a meeting with the parents, then work with the adolescent. What the adolescent says in sessions stays between us, except in situations where their safety is at risk. For adolescents under 18, the work always begins with the parents' consent. Fee: 250 lei / session.
First meeting
Write me a few lines about what brings you. There is no need to explain everything.
Or write to me directly at radutudorache@protonmail.com.
Psychological counselling does not replace a psychiatric consultation when one is needed. In an acute crisis, call 112.